Post by Revy on Jun 30, 2019 2:09:08 GMT
Rehearsal
(We get a shot of the Press Conference room, with a shoddy drawing of “LAW Homecoming” covering the JET logo. One of the boys, the suppose nephew of our drunk heroine steps up to the podium in a button up shirt and tie with the sleeves ripped off.)
Consuelo: Ladies and Gentleman, welcome to LAW homecoming. This next award will be presented to someone special. One that refuses to give up, despite either having her arm torn out of it's socket, or having the air choked out of them, Cameron, if you will.
(Brother Cameron in the same attire and popped up collar brings in a throw pillow with a cover on top of it, and Consuelo pulls it off, revealing a hand made shoddy news paper replica of the LAW Specialist Title.)
Consuelo: And this award goes to.... I can't believe my eyes. It's Revy! Round of applause, folks.
(Revy comes out from the crowd of empty tables and chairs and jumps up in excitement. She makes rounds around all the tables, running around them with her arms in the air. She gets up on one of the tables and starts jumping up and down on it screaming how she is in love with Katie Holmes. Before leaping off, and awkwarding holding the hands of Consuelo. Cameron hands Revy the “title” as she steps up to the podium. Suddenly, the big monster and step brother of Revy brings in a crown and a sash reading “Numbah One Specialist” on her.)
Revy: Oh my god! Oh my god. I can't believe this. This is like, the 5th greatest moment of my life!! I mean, who would had thought? Who would imagine that I, Revy would be a champion? Not in a million years, but yet here I am. And it's crazy how even I was never like the other girls here. I never made fake titles growing up, convincing myself that I will one day win the real one. I never trained a day in my life until recently. If you asked me 5 years ago what did I want to be in real life, I would had said a youtuber that does drinking challenges, but sadly, that isn't a thing. But Plan B, baby. It worked out. I have so many people to thank for this. My brothers, my boys, hell, even my wife of that 2 month period, my therapist, my bartender, um...um... Keanu Reeves, You're breathtaking!.... thank you all. If I forget anyone, it's because I'm drunk right now. But all of this. This is only really possible because of one person. … April, bitch. This here is because of you.
Remember back then, when you and I were both in that qualifier match to fight for the women's title to be in that extreme elimination chamber? Remember how I beat you, and people were like, WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK?! But April is the obvious choice. The best option. Prior to that win, I was losing on a weekly basis. People couldn't even comprehend why I was even in that qualifier to begin with. But all it took was one kick to the face, and you stayed down. And you know what, that is fair. You chose a submission match. It's your specialty compared to my style, which is simply, if it doesn't work, hit harder. Unfortunately, that isn't gonna work here, so I had to go to plan be. If it doesn't work.... Pull harder? Brilliant, right? I'm so smart. This is why I am the Brilliant Brawler. And this is why I will be... sorry, this is rehearsal for my inevitable win, gotta stick to the script, am the LAW Specialist Champion.
Moongoose: What are you doing?
(Moongoose walks up to the podium in the shot as Revy takes a step back)
Revy: Goose..... I'm having my rehearsal.
Moongoose: Rehearsal? For what?
Revy: When I make that bitch tap and win the LAW Specialist title. Duh!!
Moongoose: And this is..?
Revy: A ceremony for win I win, a press conference.
Moongoose: Yeah, it doesn't work like that. Even when you win the title, no one does.... this.
Revy: Well how the fuck should I know? I never ever expected to get this far. This will be my first championship win anywhere. Why you harshing my flow, bruh?
Moongoose: Woah, I'm not harshing anything. I just don't know what is going on here.
Revy: Get out of here! You're suppose to be somewhere else. You're ruining my rehearsal!! Can't you just let me have this?
Moongoose: Revy... I..
Revy: You're breaking my balls, man...... BREAKING....MAH....BALLS!!
Moongoose: sigh....... Good luck. Just remember to don't let go, and if you feel like you're going to tap, just go to your happy place.
Revy: My.... happy place?
(Revy stares towards the ceiling as we see a quick glimpse of Revy dropping a flashbang and blinding Aria Jaxon, Azumi, Haruna, and Savannah Sunshine. We return back to reality where Revy has a relaxed expression on her face with a huge grin, before she snaps out of it.)
Revy: Where he go?
Consuelo: What do you mean?
Revy: Moongoose, where did he go?
Cameron: Um, Auntie, he was never there. You're drunk.
Revy: I KNOW THAT, BUT I KNOW HE WAS JUST STANDING RIGHT THERE!
(Camera shifts to Moongoose McQueen in Washington D.C. Overlooking a cliff as he snaps back from a meditated state. He collapses as he stares into the setting sun..... he mouths the words.... “I am a Jedi.” before fading away.)
(Camera shows Revy back at the press conference room.)
Revy: I sense a disturbance.... Anyway. I am so ready for this match, April. I ain't scared. I'm sure you gonna do a lot of horrible things to me. I'm sure you are going to try to have your way with me, putting me in positions from your kumite-sutra hand book. But I will not tap. Look up my profile, see, “Revy will never tap.” If I put it on my profile, it must be true, as the internet dictates. You screwed, gurl. You done messed the fuck up. I will waste you, despite only having like one submission move in my arsenal. Good luck to who ever has to write this shit.
Consuelo: What you talking about?
(Revy slaps Consuelo across the face.)
Revy: SHUT THE FUCK UP!! THAT'S RIGHTS!! THE STFU! THE NUMBAH ONE SUBMISSION MOVE!! You might like 4 moves in your arsenal, but don't forget. I'm craaaaaaaazy. While winning a championship was never on my list of things to do. This, the specialist title, will help me cross somethings off my list. Like, being in a submission match, or a death match. We need more death matches!! Because while I don't have the wrestling skills and talents, I still have something to prove. That I actually have something to bring to the table, and the more chances that I can keep matches under my rules, I can do whatever the hell I want. And if I gotta make you submit, April. I'll take this match seriously. This is where I am confident that I can beat you. I might not have won that ladder match a few months back, but I've beaten you before, April, I know I can do it again, and when that happens, it will be all eyes on Revy. Welcome to LAW... Revy is LAW and I'm going to show it by being the toughest, most unpredictable bitch and redefine “wrestling” by not being good at wrestling at all, just really really stubborn and the absolute worse. That is my Specialty, and we'll see which one comes out on top. Your offense vs my resiliency. May the best soldier win!
(We get a shot of the Press Conference room, with a shoddy drawing of “LAW Homecoming” covering the JET logo. One of the boys, the suppose nephew of our drunk heroine steps up to the podium in a button up shirt and tie with the sleeves ripped off.)
Consuelo: Ladies and Gentleman, welcome to LAW homecoming. This next award will be presented to someone special. One that refuses to give up, despite either having her arm torn out of it's socket, or having the air choked out of them, Cameron, if you will.
(Brother Cameron in the same attire and popped up collar brings in a throw pillow with a cover on top of it, and Consuelo pulls it off, revealing a hand made shoddy news paper replica of the LAW Specialist Title.)
Consuelo: And this award goes to.... I can't believe my eyes. It's Revy! Round of applause, folks.
(Revy comes out from the crowd of empty tables and chairs and jumps up in excitement. She makes rounds around all the tables, running around them with her arms in the air. She gets up on one of the tables and starts jumping up and down on it screaming how she is in love with Katie Holmes. Before leaping off, and awkwarding holding the hands of Consuelo. Cameron hands Revy the “title” as she steps up to the podium. Suddenly, the big monster and step brother of Revy brings in a crown and a sash reading “Numbah One Specialist” on her.)
Revy: Oh my god! Oh my god. I can't believe this. This is like, the 5th greatest moment of my life!! I mean, who would had thought? Who would imagine that I, Revy would be a champion? Not in a million years, but yet here I am. And it's crazy how even I was never like the other girls here. I never made fake titles growing up, convincing myself that I will one day win the real one. I never trained a day in my life until recently. If you asked me 5 years ago what did I want to be in real life, I would had said a youtuber that does drinking challenges, but sadly, that isn't a thing. But Plan B, baby. It worked out. I have so many people to thank for this. My brothers, my boys, hell, even my wife of that 2 month period, my therapist, my bartender, um...um... Keanu Reeves, You're breathtaking!.... thank you all. If I forget anyone, it's because I'm drunk right now. But all of this. This is only really possible because of one person. … April, bitch. This here is because of you.
Remember back then, when you and I were both in that qualifier match to fight for the women's title to be in that extreme elimination chamber? Remember how I beat you, and people were like, WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK?! But April is the obvious choice. The best option. Prior to that win, I was losing on a weekly basis. People couldn't even comprehend why I was even in that qualifier to begin with. But all it took was one kick to the face, and you stayed down. And you know what, that is fair. You chose a submission match. It's your specialty compared to my style, which is simply, if it doesn't work, hit harder. Unfortunately, that isn't gonna work here, so I had to go to plan be. If it doesn't work.... Pull harder? Brilliant, right? I'm so smart. This is why I am the Brilliant Brawler. And this is why I will be... sorry, this is rehearsal for my inevitable win, gotta stick to the script, am the LAW Specialist Champion.
Moongoose: What are you doing?
(Moongoose walks up to the podium in the shot as Revy takes a step back)
Revy: Goose..... I'm having my rehearsal.
Moongoose: Rehearsal? For what?
Revy: When I make that bitch tap and win the LAW Specialist title. Duh!!
Moongoose: And this is..?
Revy: A ceremony for win I win, a press conference.
Moongoose: Yeah, it doesn't work like that. Even when you win the title, no one does.... this.
Revy: Well how the fuck should I know? I never ever expected to get this far. This will be my first championship win anywhere. Why you harshing my flow, bruh?
Moongoose: Woah, I'm not harshing anything. I just don't know what is going on here.
Revy: Get out of here! You're suppose to be somewhere else. You're ruining my rehearsal!! Can't you just let me have this?
Moongoose: Revy... I..
Revy: You're breaking my balls, man...... BREAKING....MAH....BALLS!!
Moongoose: sigh....... Good luck. Just remember to don't let go, and if you feel like you're going to tap, just go to your happy place.
Revy: My.... happy place?
(Revy stares towards the ceiling as we see a quick glimpse of Revy dropping a flashbang and blinding Aria Jaxon, Azumi, Haruna, and Savannah Sunshine. We return back to reality where Revy has a relaxed expression on her face with a huge grin, before she snaps out of it.)
Revy: Where he go?
Consuelo: What do you mean?
Revy: Moongoose, where did he go?
Cameron: Um, Auntie, he was never there. You're drunk.
Revy: I KNOW THAT, BUT I KNOW HE WAS JUST STANDING RIGHT THERE!
(Camera shifts to Moongoose McQueen in Washington D.C. Overlooking a cliff as he snaps back from a meditated state. He collapses as he stares into the setting sun..... he mouths the words.... “I am a Jedi.” before fading away.)
(Camera shows Revy back at the press conference room.)
Revy: I sense a disturbance.... Anyway. I am so ready for this match, April. I ain't scared. I'm sure you gonna do a lot of horrible things to me. I'm sure you are going to try to have your way with me, putting me in positions from your kumite-sutra hand book. But I will not tap. Look up my profile, see, “Revy will never tap.” If I put it on my profile, it must be true, as the internet dictates. You screwed, gurl. You done messed the fuck up. I will waste you, despite only having like one submission move in my arsenal. Good luck to who ever has to write this shit.
Consuelo: What you talking about?
(Revy slaps Consuelo across the face.)
Revy: SHUT THE FUCK UP!! THAT'S RIGHTS!! THE STFU! THE NUMBAH ONE SUBMISSION MOVE!! You might like 4 moves in your arsenal, but don't forget. I'm craaaaaaaazy. While winning a championship was never on my list of things to do. This, the specialist title, will help me cross somethings off my list. Like, being in a submission match, or a death match. We need more death matches!! Because while I don't have the wrestling skills and talents, I still have something to prove. That I actually have something to bring to the table, and the more chances that I can keep matches under my rules, I can do whatever the hell I want. And if I gotta make you submit, April. I'll take this match seriously. This is where I am confident that I can beat you. I might not have won that ladder match a few months back, but I've beaten you before, April, I know I can do it again, and when that happens, it will be all eyes on Revy. Welcome to LAW... Revy is LAW and I'm going to show it by being the toughest, most unpredictable bitch and redefine “wrestling” by not being good at wrestling at all, just really really stubborn and the absolute worse. That is my Specialty, and we'll see which one comes out on top. Your offense vs my resiliency. May the best soldier win!